When You Love Muscles Too Much
by The Bloody Seje
Summary: Glory hogs are dumb, egotistical and just easy to manipulate. But when an Alakazam in love with having his own personal Machoke for himself gets into a gym *full* of these dunderheads, he worries he may not live to see his goals. Or if he'll be dry before he can get to them all. Rated M for: Sexual Content


It might be cruel to think that an Alakazam manipulates gullible minds to their whim without a single forethought to the victims' consent, for they simply make for better agents of assistance to the world with their vast knowledge, rarely rivaled power and the agility to make even other Electric types shirk away from the thoughts of a race with one. Alakazam were the slim hybrid of both the wrath of brain and the greed of the brain, and the thought of one as manipulative as a blackmailing spector of deceit was as slim as their figure.

Yet you take one good look at Alistar and you realize that there was an Alakazam that fit that bold accusation in the world.

He chose his prey sparingly, not wanting to rush his antics on every available body there was around for his reach to touch. Plus, as rumors grow and surface, he has to lay low to snuff them out. Uh, not like that. Just, making them go quiet so they fade away with time. Anyway, he's taken to a very sneaky post behind a brick wall in an alleyway of a nameless town he settled into after fleeing from the last one. Apparently a community hates it when you hypnotize a beloved mayor to make a cam video about "being hot and ready for some big thugs", so that was a drama show he did _not _want the end result of should he have stayed.

Luckily this city was a gold mine of ignorant beings that fit his kind of criteria, and his target for today was such a recognizable face that it'd be a crime not to see him.

Machoke. The glory hog of Pokemon everywhere, if you're not counting Incineroar or Buzzwole should the latter be considered normal.

The gray-skinned humanoid looked like a prime beefcake just waiting to be taken in for a sampling, and Alistar was finding it hard to stay calm with how much he was ogling that departing body leaving him with a view. Machoke were born into this world-or evolved should they still be wild-with their speedos and hardly wore any other clothing provided the weather can call for it, so you can bet Alistar's eyes were on the wedgie that the man had failed to dig out from his crevice when he reached back to tend to it.

Alistar felt himself poke into the wall and realized that it was time to go. He had to make his mark now before it was too late; Machoke weren't exactly extrovert Pokemon and if he were heading anywhere in the city then he'd be going to a place where he can chat someone up that wasn't Alistar and grow out of reach. Granted, he could just look for a Machamp, but he wanted to start small-despite the evolutionary seniority he had over the guy-and Machoke were the prime specimen for the job.

One quick scope into that ignorant mind and he found the man's destination: the Iron Rig. It was a gym populated and designed for Fighting types like the Machoke and usually provided anyone who didn't fit the bill of standards the place had were demoted to being living sweat rags for the muscleheads inside. Alistar will admit he's gazed in the windows of the establishment-even now as he could easily teleport to any point of this city thanks to his mastery of Teleport-plenty, and he's gotten several views and several instances of gym customs whenever they occurred. A few tips from him would have to be as such: don't bend over in front of anyone doing a set, loitering should only be done in the lobby and not the workout area lest you want to be victim of a sweaty ambush that left you more uncomfortable than satisfied, and never ask anyone in the middle of their reps if they're nearly done. The last one makes sense because it's an indirect challenge to the working Pokemon's limits and they will take whatever measures are needed to go beyond it and eventually waste your time.

Alistar was so busy working out ways to approach how he'd lure the Machoke in for the inevitable ambush that he failed to notice that his target of attraction had reached the gym and took notice of his intensive thinking face and tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention. Alistar jumped out of his stupor and felt his heart race in a mile-fast u-turn before calming down once he saw who disturbed him.

"Oh, sorry if I scared ya there pal. You're standing in front of the door." Alistar stared at the "window" he had been looking through and indeed he had caught eyes from inside that were also wondering if he were coming in or not. Beefcakes and their inability to think of whether or not a stalker was in their midst until it was too late. Granted, Medicham and Gallade were banned from these kind of gyms-as they can work themselves with so much ease that they didn't even need to workout to be just as strong as a herculean Machamp at his prime-so it's not like they should immediately suspect of Alistar of treachery.

Despite the fact that he was plotting it.

He was grateful for wearing baggy sweatpants today, for it made his semi-hard erection seem practically invisible as he turned away to look at the Machoke.

"Sorry. Just got a bit lost is all." A lie, to fabricate a sense of pity from the glory hog in hopes of gaining their sympathy. And it worked like a charm and his head was patted again as a result.

"Must be thinking so much in that head of yours. Just relax, tomorrow's a new day."

"...Right."

"Excuse me though, gotta get in here." Alistar got into another blank expression but he stepped back to let the Machoke inside, but since he was still moving he nudged his head forward and got a whiff of that musk emanating from those firm moons barely hidden in that speedo. It left so much of a shudder that he had to scurry out of sight to let the motion commence without being questioned. Fuck, that was intense. Imagine getting an accidental sitting-on from that beefcake...Sheesh. Willing his boner to a calm would be nigh impossible, so he did his best to think of like...fucking a Muk. Yeah, that always brings him down to a calm ...Okay, semi was good. He peeked around the corner, getting his brain to concoct things in motion while he surveyed the area. No pedestrians stared his way-or at the least bothered with the young ones skipping past-so it was easy to fully observe the gym and its inner workings with his mind until he thought up of a way to make his day.

Alistar's plan was simple; get into the gym, find the Machoke's locker, steal his speedo when he goes to take a shower, and offer it back in exchange for some fun. Sounds like it won't work, right? Well, considering that Fighting types were about as scholarly as a Magikarp marooned, his chances of getting in were higher than the stratosphere. And he made short work of his entry too!

Just by walking in through the front door.

The crowd that had witnessed his little flop had already gone into the workout area, so it was just him and the receptionist, who was a Vigoroth with a very spastic attention span-seeing as he was letting his eyes whizz to just about everything else other than Alistar. All the better for the 'Zam to just waltz into the back an-

"HEY THERE TROOPER! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING WITHOUT A MEMBERSHIP CARD!?" Alistar nearly tripped over himself trying to back away from that voice, footing having a slip but catching himself with his hands before he plopped down onto the floor.

"M-mind letting me have my ears please…?" The 'Zam hoped he wasn't deaf now because he didn't get a screeching voice in response to his question. And when silence followed for more than a minute, he looked up and noticed that not only did the Vigoroth look away from him but he was busy looking at something at his computer. Alistar took the chance to simply teleport to the other side of the door to avoid tripping an alarm trying to break through the card reader keeping the door locked.

Oh sweet _**Arceus**_, it was a sweat fest in here.

Everywhere Alistar looked, he saw men hard at work, working hard to encourage their partner, or relaxing in either the pool or by the water fountain near the back. It took a bit of searching because _sweet lord almighty did everyone have a nice body to look at _but soon Alistar found the man he was looking for: the Machoke working on his cardio. He zoned out focusing on them, able to avoid immediate detection from them thanks to the fair distance and the amount of moving bodies keeping any suspicion fleeting. The 'Zam was able to drink in more and more ...and now he can watch that b-

"Hey there water boy, mind tossing me a bottle?" Alistar was shaken out of his stupor again by somebody standing near him. Looking up, he saw that it was a Conkeldurr with his hand out. One look to Alistar's right and he noticed fresh water bottles ready to be delivered to thirsty gym s. Before it was too late, he snatched the tray to hold the rest with and handed one to the red-nosed bodybuilder.

"There you are." The veiny fighting type let out a quick sigh of relief before chugging the refreshing liquids down his gullet and letting the condensation of the ice cold fluids drip onto his skin.

"Thanks bro." They left, taking the bottle with them and letting Alistar get a fleeting glance at the other man's ass. Fuck, it must be jockstrap day because that's all _everyone was wearing_. Even his target, having opted out for something to let those gray cheeks jiggle and tense up freely without restraint or discomfort. Alistar's nose twitched and his whiskers trembled. This place was a **gold mine**! His excitement was so radiant, he ended up walking out to the actual working-out area and had to avoid getting knocked out cold by passing muscular bodies or metal equipment swinging outward with someone manipulating it with their power. It was just a cesspool of raw masculinity preparing to enhance themselves and Alistar couldn't help but feel like he had shuddered his way into heaven.

His target was up ahead, but he got yanked to the side by a rugged-looking Chesnaught and his look was not playful in the slightest. Alistar thought he was found out without his knowledge and felt sweat start beading down his face, but then the armadillo silently took a water bottle and walked away.

Well that was ...weird. Anyway, back to Macho-And he's gone. Shit, where'd he go? Where'd he go? Where'd he go? Where'd he go!? C'mon, c'mon…

Ah! He's heading to the ...squat machine. Alistar watched a sweating Heracross remove himself from the machine's confines and allow the unnamed Machoke access to it, the 'Zam able to see the droplets of sweat fly off of that smooth beetle body as he got up and walked away. His sweat pants were gonna start making him look obvious so he used one of the bottles to drip some cold water droplets in there to calm himself. Ah, cruel but effective. Now then, he'll have to be careful not to get carted off by some other thirsty patr-

"'Ey, water boy!" _Oh for fuck's sake_. "Down over here, we're in need!" Alistar was glad he only had to do this job once and only for today because being commanded was **not **part of his daily routine. No sir. His flagger was a Machamp-which he took a mental note of for going after next-who was accompanied by a pair of barbell-pumping Hawlucha, who seemed quite focused on racing each other to their limits if their competitive glares at each other were any sign to Alistar. The 'Zam made to walk over, but he was stopped in place by a passing Pangoro.

"'Ey now, why don't ya hook me up with that there water real quick?" _Why were they so close to Alistar_? That bear gut was nudging his head forward and he had to stare upward just to see the bear talk down to him, but unfortunately for his decency the Machamp had stormed over and prevented him from making a decision.

"Paul, you know the rules. First ask, first serve. Can't just try and yoink some much-needed water because you came up to the guy first."

"Didn't look like you were going to bother getting up anyhow, lazy ass."

"He was already coming to give us water, what's your excuse?"

"I was here first, how's that!?"

"Watch your tone!"

"Watch _yours _and maybe I won't give ya a reason to shut your trap, Matt!"

The two's fighting were lost upon Alistar, because their petty squabble had left their own decency ignored and they were both grinding their junk on his face. Bear and humanoid musk flooded the 'Zam's nostrils and he felt like he was gonna _cream his pants_. Though he wasn't gonna embarrass himself that quickly and decided to hurriedly depart after leaving the water tray behind and whisking a fourth to throw at the bear on his way to the locker room. He couldn't hear if they were grateful or not, but rest assured he made it to some form of privacy in the shape of the locker room.

One of the flimsy doors being shut immediately made his stomach hitch up into his throat.

It was just as packed in here as it was in the workout area! Kommo-o, Throh, Sawk, Toxicroak, Hariyama, all the more obscure and less obvious fighting types were here, most likely washing off from working out earlier than those who were already at it. Alistar had to cover his nose as a Poliwrath strolled by, having had yet to shower and letting his odor try and burn out the Macho-

Oh yeah ...He was in the locker room now...And since he had the humanoid's scent in his nose from that fleeting ass show outside the gym, he simply had to focus and track a good portion of the source. He slowly stepped deeper into the sweaty sauna that was the locker room and tried his best to avoid bumping into anyone or accidentally sticking his nose where it didn't belong.

Though it was kinda too late for that last bit as he turned the corner to the row of lockers that hid his target's underwear and he walked right into a Hariyama's ass.

The big sumo hadn't noticed, nor did anyone nearby seem to look towards the situation that had been created and Alistar was given free leeway to pull away and back off to a vacant set of lockers to cough and wipe his face off. He didn't even need to breathe to know that he caught that guy at the _worst _of his workout-when he had yet to shower. It was like the bigger you got, the stronger the smell was. Alistar wouldn't be deterred for long and managed to get himself to a point where it didn't feel like all he could sense around him was cavernous asscheeks that felt like a swamp of flesh.

The sumo had thankfully already departed for the showers, so he wasn't there in that position when Alistar circled around to get back to work. There was no one else with him either, so all Alistar had to do was find the locker and collect his prize. His nose was clogged with mixed smells but he can always remember a specific aroma he wanted to learn about-the benefit of being an Alakazam-so he wouldn't be stopped by some fat guy's odor! At last, he could sense where his desires were emanating from and it smelled glorious when he stuck his nose in through one of the diamond-shaped holes of the locker door and caught a good whiff of that speedo.

Combo lock? Simple!

Alistar was glad it wasn't a padlock or anything similar because those make noise and breaking into them were harder to cover up than simply turning a dial the correct number of times. He jumped for joy as his powers succeeded in cracking the code and the door creaked open. It creaked.

_Shit_.

"'Ey, somebody over there?" Panicking, Alistar grabbed whatever he could make out as clothing, shut the door and scampered off to the other end of the lockers and to the left, just barely missing a Lucario who laxly investigated the area before shrugging and going back to his friends.

Alistar had kept silent, mainly because he was too busy snorting whatever he had in his hand bunched up against his nose while he furiously stroked himself off in his pants. He could make a mess, but he was an adept psychic type so making bubbles to pocket cum into was as easy as putting on a condom-and what do you know, the bubble was encased around his cock like a rubber too.

The more he took in, the more his dick _screamed in desire _and shot precum into his phantom condom. He didn't let his hand hit his crotch unless he gave himself away with a ***plap*** noise, so it was much easier to just stroke himself at the speed of a piston. One more whiff and he hit himself over the edge, resisting the urge to lick the Machoke's clothing as he blew a hard wad into his bubble and let it build up in his pants. No creamy substance seeped through the material, showing off just how effective Alistar was at preventing messes. No excuse for his sweat-covered face though.

The 'Zam finally opened his eyes, basking in the height of his afterglow. Man, this has just been one successful plan-albeit with a few minor setbacks-after the next. He relaxed his hand and dumped the gi into his la-

_**MACHOKE DON'T WEAR THOSE.**_

Alistar felt the color drain out of his face as he stared at the soggy karate uniform that Throh and Sawk were known for wearing, and judging by the dark grey of the material this belonged to a Throh in particular. Alistar felt bile threaten to rise up and heave onto the floor but then he remembered _he just jerked off to the musk on this_. It'd be hypocritical to act like he didn't want it, so the best thing to do was put it back and try again when the coast was clear. Speaking of clear, he quietly gulped down the uncalled-for vomit that had left his throat burning, removed his psychic condom out of his pants and shrunk it down to the size of a golf ball before pocketing it. Now he can move.

One quick peek around the corner brought him to notice that the Hariyama had returned but had his head in his towel and didn't have a clue he was being watched. Alistar quickly scurried back into the aisle and stuck whatever portions of the gi could fit in through the holes of the locker door he nabbed it from and quickly searched through the adjacent lockers to see if his mistake could be rectified. Unfortunately, just as he backed away to try and get a clearer view of what he suspected was the speedo, he was alerted by a voice.

"Hey." One slow turn to his right and he saw the Hariyama staring at him. Alistar's eye twitched in stress but he kept his cool so it didn't look immediately obvious that he was ticked off with all of these distractions.

"Hi there."

"You a towel boy or something?" Sheesh, was anybody that weren't sweating from head to toe considered staff here?

If so, that's both insulting and helpful for Alistar's endeavors.

"Uh, yes actually. Was just about to go fetch another set. Why?"

"Might need two; one for getting clean and one for my ass. Feels like a swamp back there and it's messing with me a bit." _You don't say, you fat blimp_? "No rush, but I don't wanna cause a wet floor accident, you know?"

"Sure thing..." Alistar was fuming but the only sign was his twitching whiskers as he departed from the aisle and headed for a storage closet or something similar. What he came across was a small room with a shelf full of towels, ranging from washing to drying with a few in-between for what Alistar assumed was for the Hariyama's dilemma. He grabbed several-some for in-hand and others to hang over his shoulder-and departed to return to the sumo.

Only to find out who he was actually looking for to was _talking to the dirty man_.

"...set up a good diet so you don't get tired so easily. Sound good?"

"I guess so. Thanks, Nate."

"No problem, Harry. Just keep it up, you'll get there in no time." The newly named Machoke departed from view, leaving Alistar to stare blankly towards the wall nearby. The humanoid had been facing away from him, so all he received from the scene was the full moon before it bounced away and left a hairy fat guy in its wake. This happened to get Alistar back in gear, but he swore he'd be running dry before he even _got home_.

"Here's your towels…" Two drying ones, since Hariyama were pretty big guys and Harry was no exception, were deposited to the turgid male on the bench.

"Oh, thanks buddy." And of course the sumo started off by _drying his ass_. Alistar looked away from the silly display of a Hariyama riding a towel up and down his taint to see the man of his attraction get ready for a shower. His jockstrap had been peeled off, dumped onto the floor forgotten as he hauled his own drying towel over his shoulder and left the aisle to grab a faucet before they were all taken. Alistar thought his luck couldn't get any better after having to endure so many drawbacks that came without warning.

He was quick to slip that jock off the floor, quietly sucking in the aroma of a sweaty man's package into his snout and reinvigorating his olfactory senses to let the scent permeate throughout his nostrils. That's how much he _loved _this. He was so into it that he reached to quell his boner right then and there, seeing as he didn't have much left to d-

"Hey towel boy, some folks looking for ya down the way." _And there it is_. Alistar felt his head tick with a vein as Harry called out to him from behind. Can't a man sniff another man's jock in fucking peace!?

"S-sure thing, I'll be right over…" He begrudgingly stuffed the jock in through one of the locker slots, stuffed his boner down his leg and stomped his way towards the front of the locker room. He was livid but he shouldn't let that deter him-after all, he finally got a good taste of what he was working with and knew he made the right choice in trying to focus on Nate.

Funny how his name doesn't have a matching first letter with his species but what're you gonna do, invent a new language primarily spoken by Machoke?

His destination was a locker aisle of nothing but Sawk, the group of them regarding Alistar for a moment before they all approached to receive a towel for each other. He was quietly thanked after delivering one to them all though he swore he heard one snicker as he left to try and check Nate out in the showers. Some stragglers who were just coming out waved at him in friendliness and all he did was wave back briefly. A gym wasn't the place to create animosity, though Harry was slowly becoming the least favorite among them all as his pungent aroma still lingered in the sea of Nate that Alistar wanted to drown in over and over.

The showers were packed, all of the nozzles occupied to a point where almost each one had a or two waiting to use it behind the guy inside the stream. It made for some of the most close quarters nudity that Alistar's ever seen-and he's seen orgies in porn-and he was proud that he was somehow inducted into being a faculty member for the Iron Rig or he'd have been pulled out by one of the nearby gym goers by now. His perverted ways were surely going to flourish here but how could he manage such a haul? One at a time seemed to make the most sense; two would catch attention and start rumors and three and onward would probably give his intentions away and he'd get fired.

In the midst of his inner mulling, he almost missed Nate getting into a stream nearby that he could easily situate himself behind, but he was cut short by Harry wordlessly walking past him and taking the spot right behind Nate that would leave him ass out of luck-pun not intended. Alistar groaned and rubbed his face over, taking notice that his face fur was still covered in other people's sweat; Harry, Nate and the Throh whose gi should be burnt in a fire for being the reason he came for the first time today instead of being Nate's speedo. Speak of the devil, a Throh strolled out of the shower and pulled a towel off of Alistar's shoulder as he stared wide-eyed from between his fingers in fear of being caught but let out a breath of relief that he wasn't. He didn't see any movement from the shower area, so he assumed that the Throh had been holding a stream down for the long run and no one dared tried to wait on him.

Good on those kind souls because it allowed Alistar to abandon his temporary duties as a towel boy to try cleaning his face off.

The best part about the Iron Rig was that soap bars were always waiting for dirty gym s, so Alistar only had to ditch his sweat pants on the way in before locating that vacant stream and teleporting into the middle of it before someone else saw it free for the taking. He quickly grabbed the bar, noting a few hairs that a quick Psychic easily got rid of, and let it soak into his fur into that sud-filled concoction that promoted cleansing. He was furious in scrubbing his face clean, trying to let it hang without the fear of someone accidentally whiffing near him and thinking he went on a sniffing spree. He was so into keeping himself clean that he almost missed the tap on his shoulder. Carefully peeking out from his soapy face mask, he looked to his left and saw a Hitmonlee staring down at him.

_Why is everyone here so keen on making his heart race a mile a minute by not speaking first?_

Alistar waited for a response since he looked over, but he took notice of the lack of a mouth for the brown lad to talk with just in time for the kickboxer to give him a thumbs up. Confused, Alistar expressed his concern as to what the 'Monlee's intent was for it with his gaze, only to have the guy point down and Alistar to see that he had just been ogled by a stranger. He blushed and waved off the silent compliment and was pleased to see the Hitmonlee leave him be for now.

Good, because he was not about to explain why his cock hung so low between his legs. Long story short, watch your drinks. You may just find some experimental enhancers that doesn't leave your meat shrunken like a raisin when all's said and done.

Alistar felt less filthy a minute later but in his haste he left his eyes stinging and unable to crack open even a peek without the searing pain rendering them useless. So he had to look into his mind for the memory of where he stood outside the showers before teleporting to that area. Thankfully, he didn't teleport into anyone but palming around the bench for where he left them and his pants yet came up dry. _Fuck_. He kept trying, feeling his pants nudge one of his toes so his focus deviated for a minute to register that he had clothes nearby, and nearly went back into the shower in his search before he felt the wispy material of a towel nudge his index finger. Quickly snatching it, he dabbed his eyes of soap and gave them a quick rub down to soothe them in case he went a little hard on them. Their fault for being weak to suds.

The stinging pain was gone and Alistar was able to see ...a Passimian ...looking back at him ...as his hands were positioned in a way that suggested he just had ...a towel in his hands a moment ago….

This gym was gonna give him a heart attack.

Alistar fought tooth and nail to not shout out in anger as he quite literally just dirtied his face up again after catching the scent of ape musk on the towel he just used, merely giving it back, collecting his pants to put them back on and slowly backing away with his hands up before getting a move on. He wasn't greeted with a screech of offense from behind, so he hoped he hadn't weirded the guy out into starting a rumor about him.

Now he had to go get more towels so he could actually dry off.

The aisle where the Sawk group had been was empty so he cut through it so he could get to the towel cabinet and retrieve more to dispense and use for himself. He was not going home looking like he went out on a run and just got out of a cafe to start the way back to where he started. Readorning his entourage of drying articles, he left the cabinet and got back into patrolling the aisles.

It was better this way than being called, because he can make sure he didn't have to worry about being interrupted from his perverted actions by someone in need of a towel. The patrons who flagged him down as he was going passed thanked him briefly before getting back to toweling themselves dry and Alistar felt a bit of pride knowing he was helping them out. Huh, so this was what it was like being an assistant and not a boss.

Hmm, could use more action honestly.

Alistar was just about to run out of towels when he bumped into someone-thankfully belly first-and stumbled back before catching himself. He didn't taste fur in his mouth but he was lucky since who he had come across was covered in what he assumed was a girdle of fur. The fire beard ignited after a snort and Alistar looked up into the Emboar's face before he got assumed of.

"Need a towel?" He only had a couple left, but he luckily had one the size of a handkerchief on-hand and ready to be soaked up in another guy's sweat. But the big pig didn't take it, just sneering down at Alistar without a word before pointing to something nearby. Confusion swam over Alistar's face, but when he saw what he was directed to he began to drown in that initial misunderstanding as a stack of what looked like fresh towels were resting in a cart. Mind you, unfolded, but he figured you only had to keep them looking nice in the closet and not outside of them since gym goers were gonna dirty them up anyho-

"Wash those first." The Emboar's voice was filled with resentment, so Alistar knew getting on this guy's good side was gonna be as possible as forgetting this day naturally. He nodded without another word and darted off to man the cart. There was still room in it, so Alistar assumed that he'd be collecting any used ones that came by or were left behind. The pig had long since gone once Alistar observed his situation so he didn't need to be directed by a hateful voice before getting to work again.

Towels flew in from every aisle he went through, his powers making the ones that had been left to hang on benches or luckers a breeze. He nearly ripped a towel off of a conversing Scrafty but he rectified his mistake and tied it back before the hoodlum noticed he almost got exposed in front of his Infernape friend. The cart was heavier than it was before he grabbed it, but Alistar and menial labor went together because he made it look like it was a small chore with Psychic. He saw a side room that smelled of detergent and went inside to see a washer and dryer. Industrial-sized pair, good. Alistar had to be quick because he could hear people shouting out for the towel boy and he had to focus here instead of who was calling specifically so he could telekinetically deliver towels. Most of the towels were relatively clean save for the sweat they collected into their material so Alistar was dumping them inside the washer without a hassle.

Then he got to the deep end and had to suppress gags.

Some of these people were just filthy at heart, it seemed; a few of the ones near the bottom were covered in hair and/or in earthy stains that Alistar was sure wasn't savory for anyone with a nose for masculinity in gas form. He bit back another round of bile and quickly dumped those decrepit abominations into the machine before the cart was finally empty. He hadn't read the instructions on the towels to see if he needed to add bleach, but he put some in anyway so he didn't have to look at those long streaks for any longer than he had to. He kicked on the washer, shutting the door and letting it do its thing before leaving.

Now he could get the rest of the towels out and stall out anymore requests once he ran out for good.

The cabinet was cleaned out after he got to it, and as an extra tidbit he grabbed a nearby discarded pipe so he could knock on the lockers for attention. It worked, much to his glee and soon he was devoid of towels as planned. He whisked himself back towards the laundry room and noticed that the washing machine was spinning in a blur that made him dizzy the second he looked at it. He mentally noted that the timer on it was nearing the end of its course and left it to its business again.

Once Alistar settled down, he looked around. Hmm, not too many people filing through the locker room and he didn't see hide nor hair of Nate anywhere. Maybe the Machoke went back to continue working out or left. Either way was fine with Alistar, for he had a sure lock on that guy's musk for sure and tracking it would be child's play. Certain of himself, he just sat there and waited for the towels to finish.

Along the way, the lone bench he sat one was joined by another presence. Having been daydreaming about what he could do with Nate once he achieved his goal of getting the guy in his house, it took a fair minute for Alistar to realize he wasn't alone until he looked over on his way to free the now completely washed towels from their swirling prison and seeing an Infernape. Judging from the knowing look that the ape gave him, it was the same guy who had been listening to the Scrafty he nearly pantsed. That stare was getting to Alistar, and it was a bit awkward just standing there stock-still with your body in that leaned-forward position, so he kept waiting on the simian to speak before he actually did.

"I don't think you work here…" Why must everyone here have a deep voice?

"I beg your pardon?"

"You. Don't work here. I'm friends with the towel boy and you sure ain't him." Shit shit shit shit shit-

"Come now, haven't you heard of multiple shifts?" Alistar quickly loaded up the dryer with the soaking wet towels, being careful not to let any of the fluids they were dripping get onto his pants.

"He was on his lunch break when you 'decided to take over', so either you're gonna tell me what you really want or someone's gonna get a ban from the Iron Rig."

Oh blackmail. That sure was original to listen to. Alistar felt himself relax even though the Infernape was looming over him from behind.

"Are you sure you wanna do this?"

"My friend needs all the money he can get to keep his life in order, and some random guy who knows how to hand out towels isn't gonna cut in on that and cause problems."

"A real shame. I send my condolences to this friend of yours but sure you can-POFFIN BUSH!" Alistar's outburst was followed by him pointing somewhere off behind him. The content of the phrase didn't matter to logic because the shock of the suddenness was more than enough to get the ape to turn around anyway and let Alistar put the guy to sleep with a quick Hypnosis. He dragged the guy further in so no one saw him slump over to the floor before Alistar could catch him.

"Sheesh, here I thought I wouldn't have to do this to someone." Being a domestic Alakazam meant that only Psychic was his real power trick. Teleport and Hypnosis were for getting into convenient spots and out of sticky situations respectively, so what could his fourth move be, you may ask?

Mind Reader, of course.

He dug through the Infernape's unconscious mind for the memory of him being told by this friend of his that he had suspicions of Alistar and swiftly covered it up with a little false information. A love confession should work as a replacement. The immediate memory of their encounter was ripped out, carefully so there was no brain damage left behind before he pulled out. When all was said and done, Alistar watched as the ape's body jumped a tad with every ***thunk. thunk. thunk. thunk. thunk. thunk.*** of the dryer working those towels to that freshly laundered heat. Against his better judgment, Alistar saw this as an opportunity to properly get a quick load out of his nuts so he wouldn't pop any more boners while he continued trying to find a way to have Nate to himself.

The laundry door was lockable from the inside and the dryer was loud enough to muffle any quieted noises, so all Alistar had to do was make sure he kept that door shut and strip out of his pants before bringing the Infernape to a bent over position over the rumbling machinery before them. The simian had a nice pert ass, kinda like his in fact, but he could care less about it since it belonged to a snitch.

Alister let his reinvigorated erection force its way into that oven of a hole, ignoring the friction of fucking a Fire type without the proper lube necessary to it properly and just letting things ride. It was a tight space, so Alistar had plenty of reason to just push his way through without a care in the world for the Infernape's sake. His cock was noticeable down below, loins knocking into the ape's thighs like twin pendulums and helping tease out some precum so these walls would stop trying to burn his dick. And it worked-to an extent-so Alistar didn't have to worry about leaving here limping because he didn't want to agitate possible blisters on his tender flesh.

He wasn't able to "get things done" purely off the course of action he was taking here, and the vibrating dryer below was little help since he wasn't screwing the Infernape while he was on top of it nor matching its rhythmic discourse, so he brought up the many visuals of ass in his memory bank and pulled up Nate's to try and help himself out before he had a case of blue balls. Ah, those gray globes...squishy-looking but muscled just like the rest of that body...bouncy, probably fun to play with and grab ...and that hole...that sweaty ...unclaimed hole…

Alistar gasped out of his stupor just in time to catch himself beginning to shoot, leaving a fresh creamy mess inside this stranger he subdued with his powers. He felt a twinge of regret that he just took advantage of a guy looking out for his friend but he had plans to ruin Alistar's experience with the Iron Rig, so he better be lucky _this _was all he was gonna do to him. When he pulled out, a few strings left themselves on the monkey's taint and Alistar shrugged them off as merely a good way to portray the idea of a guy getting fucked so deep yet still unable to take every ounce of nut. Right on queue, the dryer came to a stop and the unconscious simian stopped shaking and in turn causing more seed to ooze out of his pucker.

Alister moved him into the immediate corner and dumped him there so he would fish out the towels, now carrying the fresh scent that had accompanied him when he first started his new job as a towel boy against his will. The cart probably had ways to avoid being a lingering mobile that smelled clean and dirty at the same time so Alistar piled on the fresh towels and left the room with the monkey left to muck up the floor.

Right, time to resupply the cabinet and leave this cesspool of mistakes and failures. He's been here long enough.

Folding towels were no issue when you're a Psychic type, so the pocket space was slowly filled up with all those pure white articles in no time flat. Alistar was so busy, he almost elbowed someone in the crotch as they were leaving, only nicking them in the inner thigh yet still managing to get them to double over in pain. One glance over his shoulder and he froze.

It was the Throh from the showers.

He glared at Alistar, as if trying to telepathically transmit the pain to him to him but only seeing it as a minor inconvenience and shrugging it off before standing up straight. Alistar was about to be relieved that he didn't get punched-or worse, flung from this end of the locker room to the other side-but before he would relax a red hand situated itself on his shoulder and he clenched up so tight it was a miracle he didn't get caught being scared.

"Nice hit...Might need to work on knowing who it is before you throw one out. After all, we've already gotten past introductions." The Throh left it at that and left the room, leaving Alistar to look at him in astonishment. Then just as he got back to folding towels, it hit him.

_The Throh knew._

A fleeting memory of the Sawk that had snickered when Alistar was handing towels around for that grouping flashed past and he felt a blush rise up on the bridge of his snout. So that's how the two species were connected besides similar outfits-they could tell scents off one another and if they were residing on others. And since Alistar had huffed his way to a rather explosive climax with just a sweaty gi…

That brought another problem to mind-he was still _naked_.

In his haste to do the job he wasn't actually assigned to, he forgot to put his clothes back on so he still had decency. Shit, another muck-up. Why must today be so out of order for him? He just wanted to fuck a Machoke and be on with his life before he came preying on that Machamp from the workout area! And possible others!

Alistar groaned and abandoned the closet before blinking out of view only to reappear at the laundry door. One click and it parted open to see the Infernape still knocked out but the Alakazam's pants residing at the edge of the puddle of spent seed that formed around his lower half.

Remember that tick mark that had grown when Harry was annoying him? It was back, and with a vengeance.

Alistar growled under his breath before throwing his musky pants into the washer and setting it to a quick timer so he could dry them and get back to wearing them. In the meantime, he shut and locked the door behind him. The washing machine didn't make too much noise but it was enough to hide the sound of someone getting their throat fucked raw against the door.

Alister was even more ruthless this time around, uncaring that he was sticking his dick down a tract that felt like fleshy fire all over, though unlike last time he actually used one of his psychic condoms to keep him protected from the third degree burns that should be leaving his cock a blistered mess without it. His sneer down at the monkey was full of loathing, a simple menial error in today's plan being treated like capital murder. Those hips of his were rushing forth so hard it was a surprise he hadn't busted a hole into the door since it was made of wood, but at least Alistar was kind enough not to do this against a metal door.

That'd be a free concussion waiting to happen.

He blew his unceremonious wad down the Infernape's throat within time, having had to work from the start of his pants being washed to the end so he wasn't caught in the middle of it by a very noisy gym goer. Though once he flicked his pants into the dryer and the rumbling started, you can bet he was back at it with stretching that throat out.

Remember that Hitmonlee that had gestured a compliment to Alistar about his cock size? He had been right to, since even though he was filling out every inch of the ape's throat with his tender meat, there was still some inches yet to experience the sweltering inferno. Alistar actually tried to follow the rhythm of the rickety dryer behind him and was surprised to find that it was humorous to be on-key with a makeshift tune.

Of course, Nate's visage came to the rescue when the dryer was starting to finish and Alistar wasn't even close to being on-key with it and that next load slowly dripped down into the protective condom before Alistar pulled out while pulling it off to let it fall into the ape's belly. When the timer went off and the rumbling actually stopped, the 'Zam took notice of how hot it was in there. Combined with letting off some steam into the simian before him Alistar put two and two together.

Now _he _was smelly.

He yanked his pants out of the dryer and left the laundry room again, just letting the Infernape slump up against the door for anyone to come across while the gym was still open. The locker aisles were more and more vacant, with so few actually having occupants and even then fewer still to take up space. Alister journeyed towards the showers after securing a new towel and made sure his dick was still somewhat out of his pants but out of sight so he didn't smear any leftover spunk on the interior.

Lots of the faucets were open this time, only a few occupied by some stragglers that probably came from the workout area or simply decided to wait out until the showers were mostly clear of a crowd before going in. That Kommo-o from earlier was a part of this small get-together, being the closest to the observing Alistar and snorting towards him.

"Better hurry up, afternoon crowd's to come here and you'll have to go take home shower." What a peculiar accent on the dragon. Either way, Alistar took that advice to heart and scurried back into the shower, able to hang his belongings over the dividing wall that separated it from the lockers and keeping it close by while he got busy scrubbing his full body rather than just lathering up his hands to cleanse his face off. No neighbors to compliment his cock this time but frankly it was better he have no more distractions than he already allowed.

In fact, let's recap while he cleaned off his sweaty body. His initial plan was to get in the gym, befriend Nate, gain his favor after his workout and then go home with him so he could play with his body until sunrise tomorrow and hopefully keep him as a permanent friend-with-benefits so Alistar wouldn't be bored with this city.

Instead, he's been forced into two jobs he didn't want but did well, been in the middle of two people to a point where they were grinding on him, accidentally put his face in a Hariyama's hairy ass, jerked off to a Throh's musk, had a Hitmonlee give him praise for his larger-than-normal penis, nearly got a rampaging Passimian on his case, and essentially drugged and butt-fucked an Infernape before skull-fucking them twice later.

Today was just not Alistar's day it seemed.

The stream came to a stop once he got rid of the suds all over his furry bod, drying himself off where he stood so he didn't go out naked yet again and need to amend his mistake yet again. He passed by the scaly drake on his way out and nodded to him out of respect. It took a bit but eventually the Kommo-o regarded him standing there and nodded back to him, so thus Alistar left all that behind. Pants on, towel discarded to an empty towel cart meant for dirty ones, Alistar could finally lea-

...He forgot to grab Nate's underwear. _He forgot one of his tasks for his plan_.

Alistar felt like a blood vessel was gonna pop in his eye as it twitched in the midst of his livid stomp-fest to that locker aisle. He was tired of the locker room, can he have a reason to leave it before his unfortunate victim woke up and exposed what happened to him-somehow-to someone important!?

Once he got back to the aisle, he was glad to see it empty. More than enough opportune time to get to Nate's locker and scour it for any discarded clothing he could steal for himself. While he had been too late and the Machoke had left with his speedo, that jockstrap was still inside the locker and barely hidden in the rest of the junk inside. Guess this was his gym go-to and his speedo was his daily wear.

All the more reason for Alistar to yank it out of that locker and pocket it so he would get on his way. He felt the squish of one of his condoms in there with it and felt it fitting to have it accommoda-

A sniffling nearby alerted Alistar that someone was close, and in the aisle where he hid from that Lucario earlier and jerked off to a javelin professional's smelly clothes. Slowly, he brought himself around the corner and came across a rather unsightly visage.

Harry was on the locker room floor, trying not to sob too loudly but his trembling eyes proved that he failed at being subtle about it. It was a very unsavory sight for anyone, because Harry was clearly a grown man starting to wilt out of his prime and he didn't sound like he was doing too well when he and Nate were chatting earlier. Guess this means he had a lot of deeper stuff going on than Alistar assumed.

He knew he shouldn't care one bit about this sumo wrestler, especially on account of getting a faceful of unwashed ass without proper regard and leaving the 'Zam to tend to it himself, but it was best not to make enemies here. Unless he wanted to have a bad time trying to snoop around more often.

The Hariyama didn't even notice Alistar taking a seat on the bench he was keening next to until he started wiping his eyes clear of tears, and by then he was defeated and far too ashamed to really care that he didn't have clothes on. He sighed and hauled his heavy frame off the marble tiles and groaned as the uncomfortable flooring had left a crick in his arm. "Hey there….how much of that did you see?"

Must have thought Alistar had just snuck over and watched him cry like a sadistic king wanting to watch a slave suffer in front of an audience. "I...saw the last bit."

"Well...better than going through the whole thing...Listen, you don't need to know my little sob story so I won't bore you with the details." Okay good, maybe Alistar can get out- "Long story short, my wife doesn't like me getting fired from so many jobs and she might win my house in the divorce settlement."

Aaaaah, fuck.

"Are you ...sure she would?" Alistar didn't know why he was trying this, but hey maybe not having a crying, hairy overweight sumo wrestler in his head all day as a constant reminder of a good will he ignored was better than having the image there.

"Judge likes her case better than mine. At best, I get to keep all the other stuff besides the house and I can just move it all somewhere I can crash. Been asking Nate to see if he could let me bunk with him, but he's been trying to deal with his own living situations. Got a case of termites."

"Oh dear, that's a lot...It must be murder on your heart to have to deal with it all."

"Yeah, I guess...Just wish things could have happened differently between me and the woman….wasn't sex, mind you. I know what I'm doing."

"I...wasn't going to ask if it was that."

"Oh. Sorry, I'm still a bit emotional. But yeah, she didn't like that I couldn't provide for us both consistently anymore and wanted out so she could fend for herself. I tried to tell her that my bosses kept assuming I was a sex offender and kept trying to find ways to blame me for stuff so they could fire me and it worked considering that getting fired over and over was starting to show on me. I mean, I could be just fine on a regular day and someone could tell I've been through it, you know?"

"Oh yes, stress and anger tend to show a lot."

"Yeah, you get it...Anyhow, I was stress eating to cope with my failing marriage and lousy job track record so now I'm overweight for a Hariyama of my age, barely able to exercise since I lose energy too quick and I'm teetering on being homeless again. So yeah, my life sucks."

Well so much for not disclosing a sob story. Alistar had half a mind to remind Harry that he promised not to dump all of that on him, but he withheld from being petty. At least it wasn't some expositional telling of his divorce and subsequent events that led to him being fatter-than-fat. "I see. I hope you can pull through it all. You're not a bad guy from what I can tell."

"Heheh. Thanks. Wish all my bosses knew that but they love to believe a lady over an honest, hard-working man any day because of her rack." Jeez, Harry must have been getting the filthy end of the stick lately. "Well, I gotta get out of here. Today was supposed to be my last day of being a member here before my membership expired for good and I barely got to spend it how I planned."

Now doesn't that sound familiar? "I hear ya, I hear ya."

"This might sound weird, but if you head back to the showers before you go, could you make sure Nate's alright? He has a bad habit of falling asleep under the hot streams and it's bad for his skin to be all prune-y. Anyhow, you have a nice day, towel guy."

"See ya ...Harry." The Hariyama finally got on his feet, finally going into his locker for his belongings after having left it unlocked to cry instead and putting on some underwear that thankfully didn't leave little to the imagination. However, Alistar still got mooned by the unaware sumo wrestler and his unsee urges were tingling again. But he held away from treating Harry like he were scum of the earth. He's been through a lot and Alistar can somewhat attest to that considering all the clearing up he had to do just to _get to this city_. Anyway, he got himself up off the bench and made his way for the door after the big guy. The second he reached for the unlock mechanism, he froze and remembered the showers were still going.

_Nate was still in the showers_.

Alistar felt like he was just about to stumble upon his greatest stroke today as he practically skipped down the pathway towards the shower area. And much to his amazement, there was Nate at the far left stream, naked as the day he was born and sound asleep. That dragon wasn't here to judge him so Alistar went ahead and stripped down to get a better view.

There it was. The ass that drew him to infiltrate this gym and see if he could sample it or even better claim it. It was soaked all over in water, so Alistar had to reach in to pull it towards him so he could gaze upon its glory at an even better angle. The Machoke was snoring to himself, slumped over the wall with his head down so the 'Zam didn't have to worry about accidentally leaving the guy to drown. He was finally free to sample that supple _ass_.

_And that was cut short when the locker room started bustling with activity._

Confused, Alistar hurriedly let go of Nate's butt and let him flop forward until he was down on his elbows and knees in the most god-blessed, suggestive position that Alistar could imagine him in before it hit him. _The afternoon crowd_. The Kommo-o had warned him and yet he still got sidetracked by Harry's depressive tale and thinking about that unfortunate simian in the laundry room. He didn't want to lose his chance to finally score Nate for himself, so he dragged the Machoke off of the floor and towards the locker room benches, letting him fall ***splat*** onto the wooden structure and quickly drying off his crotch so that he could slip that delightful speedo on without it rolling up on the way to being secure. Footsteps approached with glee, so he shoved them on as best as he could manage without it looking like he had just been caught sucking the Machoke off-granted, that was a good idea-and quickly hauled Nate over his shoulder in a way that left passersby staring at his snoring face rather than the lazy view of his halfway covered ass.

That tan line just made it even more blatant.

Alistar endured the wolf whistles his slumbering passenger received on his way to the Machoke's locker, dumping Nate on the floor to make it look like he was sitting up comfortably. But his head lolled forward and he still looked peacefully asleep. Must be a deep one, Alistar figured. Anyhow, he broke into Nate's locker properly this time and moved back to let it open far enough to get his traveling items. It was easy to pick out, since he didn't bring much to the locker at all, so Alistar was busy closing the door when he realized something else.

_He was naked again_. _And his pants were back at the showers_.

ARCEUS BE DAMNED, WHY MUST THE UNIVERSE KEEP KILLING ANY CHANCE HE HAD AT GETTING OUT THIS GODDAMN LOCKER ROOM!?...

Okay, mental rant over. Alistar didn't even bother trying to check if the showers were overloaded with people, merely teleporting to where he knew he had left them and thankfully grabbed them without them being under someone's foot.

Though before he could go back to Nate, a nearby wolf whistle alerted him to a gym goer behind him. He looked from between his legs and saw the upside down visage of a Toxicroak winking at him and licking their lips.

...Nope, no more distractions. He glared at the amphibian for making him stall time and he blinked back to where he had left off with Nate. Without a care in the world, he put on his pants in front of the snoring bodybuilder and made sure they were on tight before picking the big guy up and hauling him over his shoulder again. This time, he fixed that speedo so it wasn't so damn suggestive to passersby, but he had left a wedgie in and people still stared as he made his way out of the locker room. When he grabbed the door, he noticed a white figure limping just out of the corner of his eye and Alistar turned to see the Infernape seeing himself out of the laundry room…

No. No more distractions. He had Nate and that's all that mattered. Since he figured that the showers meant that one was done for the day, Alistar stepped back into the main area and opted for a side door to leave out of.

Finally, things were going _his _way.

* * *

**Will Alistar have Nate to himself?**

**Will Harry be out on his ass and homeless for the rest of his life?**

**Will that Infernape ever recover from being taken advantage of?**

**And will that Heracross ever invest in anti-perspirant deodorant spray?**

**We might never know because this is a one-shot and I dunno if a sequel is in order.**


End file.
